7 Secrets of Writing Sibling Relationships

Whether best friends or worst enemies, brothers and sisters can add depth and emotion to your story. Although the Character House covers relationships in general, sibling relationships deserve a post of their own. The following tips will help you bring your fictional siblings to life.

Why Are Sibling Relationships Important?

Sibling relationships can make characters relatable and likable. Even if their life experiences don’t resemble the events of your story, most readers will be able to relate to the positive and negative interactions between fictional brothers and sisters.

Siblings can drive your plot by serving as allies, adding conflict, and raising the stakes. The need to protect a brother or sister can give your hero a powerful motivation to pursue the story goal. Even when siblings don’t appear in the story, they can significantly influence your character’s backstory. 

Tips on Writing Sibling Relationships

1. Consider the relationship from both sides.

Even if you’re only writing from one point of view, both siblings should be developed as individuals. What does each sibling think of the other? What do they like or dislike about each other? What activities do they enjoy together? What history do they share?

2. Add depth.

Your sibling characters might love each other but also get on each other’s nerves. They might argue frequently but stand up for each other when it really counts. In Shannon Stocker’s Stronger at the Seams, Twyla loves her younger brother, Wolfie, but she also occasionally gets annoyed with his silly habits. Conversely, Wolfie often teases Twyla, but he also lovingly supports her during her chronic illness. 

Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi’s Relationship Thesaurus lists a variety of possible dynamics for sibling relationships. These ideas can provide a great starting point for your brainstorming.

3. Pay attention to ages and birth order.

The siblings’ dynamic will differ based on whether they’re close in age or several years apart. Their specific ages will also influence their interactions. A relationship between sisters in middle school will differ from one between sisters in college. Research, interviews, and imagination can help you write relationship dynamics that you haven’t personally experienced. 

4. Personalize the relationship with unique details.

You can enliven a generic sibling relationship by adding character-specific details, such as backstories, hobbies, inside jokes, shared memories, favorite activities, conflicts, and life circumstances.

In Tessa Afshar’s Thief of Corinth, Ariadne and Theo share an interest in athletics, so they enjoy exercising and training for races together. These tangible details deepen the relationship and enable the audience to relate to the sibling pair.

5. Break stereotypes.

Be aware of common sibling stereotypes, such as the bossy oldest, the forgotten middle, and the spoiled youngest. In some cases, you can twist these tropes. What if your oldest has an irresponsible side? What if your youngest has developed unusual maturity to keep up with the older kids?

In other cases, you can give the trope depth. Perhaps your youngest sibling doesn’t appreciate being treated like a baby, or your middle child prefers to avoid the attention of parents.

6. Include the siblings in your story.

Although not every story calls for sibling characters, numerous novels use siblings to create gripping plot points.

In many cases, siblings can motivate the main characters. The Time Door by Shannon McDermott features a pair of explorers named Margaret and David Killiam. When their team is separated in a dangerous underground cave, the brother and sister risk their lives to return to each other.

Other stories feature siblings as allies. In Jennifer A. Nielsen’s A Night Divided, Gerta’s older brother Fritz serves as the main ally in her daring escape plan. His role provides access to resources that Gerta would be unable to obtain on her own. 

7. Show progression in the relationship.

Squished, a graphic novel by Megan Wagner Lloyd and Michelle Mee Nutter, depicts Avery’s changing relationships with each of her six siblings. She used to be best friends with her older brother, Theo, but he’s recently become a moody loner for reasons unknown to Avery. This relational conflict creates emotion and depicts a relatable struggle.

When considering the progression of sibling relationships, you can ask some questions. What does the relationship look like at the start of the story? What complications (such as arguments or spilled secrets) intensify the conflict between the siblings? What does their relationship look like at the end of the story? 

Brothers and Sisters of the Fictional World

Siblings can enhance your novel in several ways. They can make characters relatable and likable, propel the plot, and add conflict.

To develop sibling relationships, consider what each sibling thinks of the other. Add depth by showing the siblings’ varied emotions toward each other. Consider birth order, ages, and variations on common stereotypes. Incorporate unique details about shared activities, memories, pet peeves, and more. Finally, show the progression of sibling relationships throughout the story.

With these tips, you’ll be able to enrich your novel with sibling relationships that readers will cherish.

---

If your current project includes siblings, what’s something you love about their relationship? 

You May Also Like

• Write What You Know Doesn’t Mean What You Think It Means
• The Importance of an Editor Who Understands Your Book
• 7 Secrets of Writing Sibling Relationships
• Service Spotlight: Developmental Editing
• 8 Effective Ways to Set and Achieve Writing Goals